My blog will now be posted at dancenataliadance.tumblr.com
And hopefully there will be more blogging in my future (put down the video game controller Natalia...)!
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
He Likes Me Better
Back in the olden days...(October 2001) there was this shy single mom who was miserable at her current job, not receiving child support, and wanted to complete her college degree and be able to be home more with her child. She, on the advice of an employee of hers that happened to moonlight as a dancer at Star's Cabaret in Beaverton, began dancing dayshifts (steadfastly refusing to try a nightshift despite pressure from management) at said club on her days off from her regular job while her child was in preschool. After a few months of averaging in one day (stripping) more than she made in one week at her retail job she decided to quit the retail job, register for community college, and go on to a fabulous life of working 2 days a week and spending TONS of time with her child.
I like to brag to friends/customers that I have always been a "smart stripper" in that because I'd had regular jobs and had "lived life" before becoming a dancer I knew what my goals were and had strong ethics that would not waiver. While these things are true there are some decisions I made as a naive dancer that were just downright stupid. One mistake I made while working at Stars started with a man named Tim.
Tim was about 5'6", overweight, balding, wore glasses, and worked for the DMV. One night (after a few months of dancing I finally succumbed to the owner's pressure to work nights) Tim came to my stage and asked me to join him at his table. I sat down with him after getting dressed and he immediately told me he'd buy 2 dances from me if I sat down and had a drink with him. I accepted his proposal and proceeded to make uncomfortable small talk with this person that didn't understand the concept of smiling but did know how to make one feel inferior and insecure with just a few words. After what seemed like forever but was probably only 10 minutes we did our dances and I moved on.
Tim began showing up every night that I worked which was about 2-3 days a week. He would usually call the club to see what my schedule was (ah, I barely remember the days before Twitter) and then show up right when I was walking in with my suitcase in my streetclothes (so about 15-30 minutes before my shift started). This didn't seem like a big deal to me at the time but it became quite significant later on. As soon as I came on shift Tim would ask me to sit with him...and I would...for about an hour...for 2 fucking dances. I was just stupid. Tim was very manipulative; he would rudely tell any dancer who approached him to go away, that he was waiting for me. Girls would tell me how he treated them and I would apologize profusely, as though it was my fault. Then when I sat with Tim he would tell me how he had sent all those other girls away because I was the most important person to him in the world. Being so naive/stupid I felt obligated to sit with him for long periods of time...as though it was my job to see after his needs. After all, it was MY fault that he didn't want anyone else, right?
So time went on and I began to gather up more regular customers until before I knew it I was in the "big leagues". Other dancers will recognize this term, it's that group of girls that's sitting at a table with some customers drinking, laughing, and either doing tons of dances all night or just being handed money to sit there. Tim wasn't happy about this at all. His $40 hour of my time didn't exist anymore and he would glare at other customers that I was sitting with until they would finally ask me to switch seats with them or move to a different table so that "that dude who's in love with you will stop killing me with his eyes". I was still available for Tim but I would apologetically explain that I couldn't sit with him for too long because my other regular(s) was/were waiting for me. So Tim began to try different tactics. First he tried not paying me for dances. He told me that that he was secretly working for the CIA and that he was spying on Star's and that if I forced him to pay me I'd get named in a government file. Well I mentioned I'd been naive but I'm not a complete idiot so that "technique" didn't work on me. Then he began claiming he didn't have the cash so 'could he write me a check'...and of course for that he'd need my full, real name. Nope. I had to get my bouncer to help out with that one. Surprisingly enough Tim somehow managed to find $40 in his wallet, lucky day!
The final straw came when Tim told me he loved the new flowers I'd planted in my front yard. When I questioned that statement he rattled off my address, which he'd memorized. Apparentely getting to Star's early enough to see his favorite girl getting her car valeted...AND working for the DMV, has its advantages. He was immediately 86ed...and I was quite paranoid for a while after that. But I began stalking HIM and found out that he later lost his job and began working as an auto mechanic so I felt a little safer...and I moved.
Tim taught me a good lesson. He manipulated my time (and me) and used guilt tactics and even some emotional abuse to keep me with him for as long as possible. Because I was a new dancer and therefore didn't have too many other people scheduling time with me his tactics worked. But I soon realized that my time at my job is being wasted if I spend an hour with someone (regardless of how much I may like them) who is only going to buy 2 dances. Believe it or not but Tim is not the subject of this blog but that story leads into what I've been going through lately.
A few weeks ago on a busy night (I think it was a Saturday) a man kept going to all of my stages and tipping me quite generously each time. I did my normal "Natalia" thing: smile, say thank you, and NOT ask for a dance. Eventually though I started to make a little small talk with him as I was getting off a satellite stage and he asked me to sit with him. LUCKY FOR HIM (ha ha) I didn't have any customers waiting so I said yes (I rarely sit with people for drinks but hey, he had made a really good impression on me). We spent about 45 minutes talking/bonding and realized we really liked each other. He then bought some dances...which then led to a 1/2 hour VIP. And he's now a regular.
Issue: This man also met another dancer that night, I'll refer to her as "Laura". Laura has only been at Dolphin II for about 6-8 months. At first she struck me as really sweet and down to earth. I introduced myself to her when I first noticed her and she seemed really warm and kind. When my new regular told me he had bought some dances from her I proceeded to sing her praises and tell him what good taste he has...but I want to take that all back now.
Laura and I have basically been competing over this man's wallet ever since that night we met him. This is how it works: She sits with him for 2-3 hours and gets him to buy her dinner/drinks while I'm running around making money and occasionally stopping by to tell him I'm sorry it's taking so long to get to him. He goes to both of our stages and tips us generously but if she's up on stage and he's sitting with me he won't go to her stage (although he may tip her) yet if I'm on stage and she's sitting with him he'll leave her to sit at my rack. He's also not buying dances from her on the nights that I'm working even though she spends half her night sitting with him. Yet he does spend money on ME. Needless to say she has stopped responding to me when I say hello to her now. He came to see her when I wasn't working to buy dances one night but she screwed that up by having the nerve to ask him to "run next door to Fantasy" to buy her a dress, and when he agreed to but then admitted he wouldn't be buying dances she said (according to him) she knew he could afford to spend more than he was. This man is not that type of regular. He's not partying with 4 girls in the VIP room throwing cash around while ordering multiple bottles of Dom. He one of those regulars, like most of my regulars, that is spending the small amount of cash that he has reserved for entertainment purposes (for me that's the movies/Starbucks/new video game fund) on me and Laura.
So at first I felt bad for Laura. I saw in her myself as that newer dancer, sitting with someone for WAY too long in the hopes that I'll score that $40 because hey, it's nice to have someone that you feel comfortable with to pass the time (this guy is not anything like Tim so Laura is quite lucky, sadly I WAS comfortable with Tim which says a lot about my upbringing). But honestly now my guilt has faded. This man is spending more money on me because he and I have not only bonded more but I haven't disrespected him. He's really sweet, kind, and very understanding about how I spend my time at work, and now he's concerned about showing up when she's working because he was so insulted he doesn't want to deal with her.
On a similar note, a good dancer friend of mine had her "best custy" in the other night and let me and another dancer "through the gate" (dancer term for allowing other dancers to sit with/make money off of your regular). He spent a shitload of money on all three of us (but the most on my friend, as is proper lol) but then when we were all saying goodbye the 3rd girl put her hand up and kept repeating "give me money, give me money...". It worked, he tipped us all but then left in a huff and texted my friend saying he'd never be back.
Luckily, my friend and I have both NOT lost our regulars but I truly wish these two Dolphin II dancers would take a step back and appreciate the money we're being given just like we expect the customers to appreciate our time and what we're doing to earn that money. I know this became very "holier than thou" but seriously, don't spend hours with someone who isn't going to pay you for it...or...spend all the time you want with that person if he's amazing and fun to be with (like my new regular) but don't disrespect him or be pissed off at him and the other girl that he likes better!
I like to brag to friends/customers that I have always been a "smart stripper" in that because I'd had regular jobs and had "lived life" before becoming a dancer I knew what my goals were and had strong ethics that would not waiver. While these things are true there are some decisions I made as a naive dancer that were just downright stupid. One mistake I made while working at Stars started with a man named Tim.
Tim was about 5'6", overweight, balding, wore glasses, and worked for the DMV. One night (after a few months of dancing I finally succumbed to the owner's pressure to work nights) Tim came to my stage and asked me to join him at his table. I sat down with him after getting dressed and he immediately told me he'd buy 2 dances from me if I sat down and had a drink with him. I accepted his proposal and proceeded to make uncomfortable small talk with this person that didn't understand the concept of smiling but did know how to make one feel inferior and insecure with just a few words. After what seemed like forever but was probably only 10 minutes we did our dances and I moved on.
Tim began showing up every night that I worked which was about 2-3 days a week. He would usually call the club to see what my schedule was (ah, I barely remember the days before Twitter) and then show up right when I was walking in with my suitcase in my streetclothes (so about 15-30 minutes before my shift started). This didn't seem like a big deal to me at the time but it became quite significant later on. As soon as I came on shift Tim would ask me to sit with him...and I would...for about an hour...for 2 fucking dances. I was just stupid. Tim was very manipulative; he would rudely tell any dancer who approached him to go away, that he was waiting for me. Girls would tell me how he treated them and I would apologize profusely, as though it was my fault. Then when I sat with Tim he would tell me how he had sent all those other girls away because I was the most important person to him in the world. Being so naive/stupid I felt obligated to sit with him for long periods of time...as though it was my job to see after his needs. After all, it was MY fault that he didn't want anyone else, right?
So time went on and I began to gather up more regular customers until before I knew it I was in the "big leagues". Other dancers will recognize this term, it's that group of girls that's sitting at a table with some customers drinking, laughing, and either doing tons of dances all night or just being handed money to sit there. Tim wasn't happy about this at all. His $40 hour of my time didn't exist anymore and he would glare at other customers that I was sitting with until they would finally ask me to switch seats with them or move to a different table so that "that dude who's in love with you will stop killing me with his eyes". I was still available for Tim but I would apologetically explain that I couldn't sit with him for too long because my other regular(s) was/were waiting for me. So Tim began to try different tactics. First he tried not paying me for dances. He told me that that he was secretly working for the CIA and that he was spying on Star's and that if I forced him to pay me I'd get named in a government file. Well I mentioned I'd been naive but I'm not a complete idiot so that "technique" didn't work on me. Then he began claiming he didn't have the cash so 'could he write me a check'...and of course for that he'd need my full, real name. Nope. I had to get my bouncer to help out with that one. Surprisingly enough Tim somehow managed to find $40 in his wallet, lucky day!
The final straw came when Tim told me he loved the new flowers I'd planted in my front yard. When I questioned that statement he rattled off my address, which he'd memorized. Apparentely getting to Star's early enough to see his favorite girl getting her car valeted...AND working for the DMV, has its advantages. He was immediately 86ed...and I was quite paranoid for a while after that. But I began stalking HIM and found out that he later lost his job and began working as an auto mechanic so I felt a little safer...and I moved.
Tim taught me a good lesson. He manipulated my time (and me) and used guilt tactics and even some emotional abuse to keep me with him for as long as possible. Because I was a new dancer and therefore didn't have too many other people scheduling time with me his tactics worked. But I soon realized that my time at my job is being wasted if I spend an hour with someone (regardless of how much I may like them) who is only going to buy 2 dances. Believe it or not but Tim is not the subject of this blog but that story leads into what I've been going through lately.
A few weeks ago on a busy night (I think it was a Saturday) a man kept going to all of my stages and tipping me quite generously each time. I did my normal "Natalia" thing: smile, say thank you, and NOT ask for a dance. Eventually though I started to make a little small talk with him as I was getting off a satellite stage and he asked me to sit with him. LUCKY FOR HIM (ha ha) I didn't have any customers waiting so I said yes (I rarely sit with people for drinks but hey, he had made a really good impression on me). We spent about 45 minutes talking/bonding and realized we really liked each other. He then bought some dances...which then led to a 1/2 hour VIP. And he's now a regular.
Issue: This man also met another dancer that night, I'll refer to her as "Laura". Laura has only been at Dolphin II for about 6-8 months. At first she struck me as really sweet and down to earth. I introduced myself to her when I first noticed her and she seemed really warm and kind. When my new regular told me he had bought some dances from her I proceeded to sing her praises and tell him what good taste he has...but I want to take that all back now.
Laura and I have basically been competing over this man's wallet ever since that night we met him. This is how it works: She sits with him for 2-3 hours and gets him to buy her dinner/drinks while I'm running around making money and occasionally stopping by to tell him I'm sorry it's taking so long to get to him. He goes to both of our stages and tips us generously but if she's up on stage and he's sitting with me he won't go to her stage (although he may tip her) yet if I'm on stage and she's sitting with him he'll leave her to sit at my rack. He's also not buying dances from her on the nights that I'm working even though she spends half her night sitting with him. Yet he does spend money on ME. Needless to say she has stopped responding to me when I say hello to her now. He came to see her when I wasn't working to buy dances one night but she screwed that up by having the nerve to ask him to "run next door to Fantasy" to buy her a dress, and when he agreed to but then admitted he wouldn't be buying dances she said (according to him) she knew he could afford to spend more than he was. This man is not that type of regular. He's not partying with 4 girls in the VIP room throwing cash around while ordering multiple bottles of Dom. He one of those regulars, like most of my regulars, that is spending the small amount of cash that he has reserved for entertainment purposes (for me that's the movies/Starbucks/new video game fund) on me and Laura.
So at first I felt bad for Laura. I saw in her myself as that newer dancer, sitting with someone for WAY too long in the hopes that I'll score that $40 because hey, it's nice to have someone that you feel comfortable with to pass the time (this guy is not anything like Tim so Laura is quite lucky, sadly I WAS comfortable with Tim which says a lot about my upbringing). But honestly now my guilt has faded. This man is spending more money on me because he and I have not only bonded more but I haven't disrespected him. He's really sweet, kind, and very understanding about how I spend my time at work, and now he's concerned about showing up when she's working because he was so insulted he doesn't want to deal with her.
On a similar note, a good dancer friend of mine had her "best custy" in the other night and let me and another dancer "through the gate" (dancer term for allowing other dancers to sit with/make money off of your regular). He spent a shitload of money on all three of us (but the most on my friend, as is proper lol) but then when we were all saying goodbye the 3rd girl put her hand up and kept repeating "give me money, give me money...". It worked, he tipped us all but then left in a huff and texted my friend saying he'd never be back.
Luckily, my friend and I have both NOT lost our regulars but I truly wish these two Dolphin II dancers would take a step back and appreciate the money we're being given just like we expect the customers to appreciate our time and what we're doing to earn that money. I know this became very "holier than thou" but seriously, don't spend hours with someone who isn't going to pay you for it...or...spend all the time you want with that person if he's amazing and fun to be with (like my new regular) but don't disrespect him or be pissed off at him and the other girl that he likes better!
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
Sensitive
It's my achilles heel. It's the one thing that brings me down when nothing else can. Some dancers let loose with angry outbursts at management or the unlucky girl who happens to be the closest, others storm out in a huff swearing they will never return. I just shrivel inside.
I remember the first time I was really affected by something someone said to me at work that brought me to the point of wanting to leave and/or slap them: I had just returned to dancing after giving birth to my child two months earlier. While on "maternity leave" from Stars in Beaverton, my best friend, my two favorite DJ's and my two favorite bouncers had all quit Stars to work at the Dolphin I...so of course I followed them out there to this little town called Milwaukie. My first day (I think I worked a mid-shift) I made nothing. I wasn't expecting a huge "paycheck" that night, after all I was fully aware that my old 110lbs self didn't exist anymore and that there was this newer, curvier girl who was 25lbs heavier but with no regulars at this new location...but sheesh, not one dance? Granted, this was Dolphin I on a mid-shift which means probably 6 men rolled through the place the entire time and there were about 8 girls working. Anyway, toward the end of my shift my best friend introduced me to a club regular (as opposed to "her regular" which means he's not good for dances but you can hang out with him, he's there everyday and he'll buy you a drink). Directly after being told, "this is Natalia, she's my best friend and we worked at Stars together" he proceeded to look me up and down in a calculating sort of way and then told me that he'd been watching me on stage all night and that I was a good dancer and pretty but would start to make money once I lost some weight in my stomach...and did I do sit-ups every day? Cause I should... I remember just staring and trying to decide whether I should offer excuses (um excuse me I just had a baby...) or punch him in his all-knowing mouth. My best friend, bless her heart, immediately came to my defense and told him I had just had a child. This then just encouraged him to mention the sit-ups to me again which is when I excused myself and left.
Usually we dancers get complimented many times throughout our shifts which is, for me, a very helpful tool for getting through the process of stripping my clothes off. I realize I shouldn't take so much stock in what other think of me/ say to me but I do...When someone says I'm beautiful they are going to get quite a show from me because their comment probably affected my confidence level in a positive way. I haven't received many negative comments throughout my years of dancing but, of course, I remember almost all of them. Recently (in the past year) I've been told maybe 2-3 times by different men, "You do amazing pole tricks for a bigger/thicker girl". Now, I realize that these people are probably genuinely trying to give me a compliment but for ME...this is one of the most insulting things you can say...and my performance immediately goes down a few notches because I find myself looking at my naked body (which I suddenly become consciously aware of) for "jiggly parts". I'm 5'3" and 128lbs...that's not "big" or "thick"...I'm also quite toned due to my pole work (although I could definitely be toner!) One girl who happened to be the date of one of these men was shocked when she heard what had come out of her man's mouth and immediately, before I could begin the internal shrivelling process, reprimanded him by telling him that "big boobs and a round ass does not equal thick Dan, and the rest of her is thin!". She then apologized to me and made "Dan" tip me more money...what a sweetheart.
I've noticed over the years that men...and women...do feel that they can say ANYTHING to a dancer, as though we can't possibly feel hurt by it. Some people probably just honestly don't know how to use tact. I was recently watching a very talented dancer on stage with one of my customers and I mentioned, when this dancer did a particularly awesome trick, that I wanted to try that one but wasn't sure if I would be able to do it (in my head I was thinking about whether I was flexible enough while trying to memorize her hand positions which were a key element of the trick). My customer said, "You know why you can't do this trick and she can? She's younger and skinnier than you". Yeah...he got yelled at. I honestly think it's the only time I've EVER yelled at a customer. I think it was something to the tune of that he should count how many dancers were there that night that were younger and skinnier than me who could also do the pole work that I do (and that pole tricks are about talent, strength and flexibility...not youth or weight).
Most of the time I honestly don't think it's a lack of tact that's the issue, it's just a misunderstanding of what/who a stripper is. It seems as though the fact that we get naked for a living translates to some people as "Hi, I'm a stripper. I get naked and therefore do not feel the same feelings that you do. Please feel free to say things to me that you would never say to any other woman you know such as your mother, sister, coworker or girlfriend. Don't worry, I've heard it all and will not get hurt. And you DID tip me a dollar on stage so...you've paid for the right to say whatever you want to me!" This doesn't just extend to the nicely packaged compliments wrapped in insults ("you're so pretty, if only you could do some sit-ups every night"/ "you're a really good dancer for a bigger girl") but it also affects a customer's curious idea of a "body part" compliment. Now, I'm a little...conservative when it comes to what I am willing to put up with so not all dancers will agree with me on this but I detest most body part compliments. I love hearing I'm beautiful, you love my eyes/hair/lips/whatever. I also will accept breasts/ass/butt compliments as long as those are the terms used. But for some reason I HATE the word "tits" and the moment you say "you have beautiful tits" as opposed to "you have beautiful breasts" I feel offended. I also have a regular...or two...or five that tend to compliment me on my vagina. No. Do not do that. Why? Because I don't give a shit what you think of it and it makes me really uncomfortable to have you comment on it. I've had customers say nice things about it while I was dancing on stage and I literally stopped showing it off for the rest of my set. Again, this is just me and my issues but I would say that it's safer to compliment us dancers (and yes, we love compliments...they do lead to better private dances or more time with us) the way you would compliment anyone else and leave the body parts below the neck out of it.
I guess I just wanted to point out with this blog that I don't usually feel naked when I'm dancing. I'm concentrating on pole work, my customers and the music. But the moments someone says something that I'm sensitive to or offended by I suddenly become hyper-aware of the fact that I'm naked and showing my "body parts" to a bunch of strangers who are judging me on my imperfections.
I remember the first time I was really affected by something someone said to me at work that brought me to the point of wanting to leave and/or slap them: I had just returned to dancing after giving birth to my child two months earlier. While on "maternity leave" from Stars in Beaverton, my best friend, my two favorite DJ's and my two favorite bouncers had all quit Stars to work at the Dolphin I...so of course I followed them out there to this little town called Milwaukie. My first day (I think I worked a mid-shift) I made nothing. I wasn't expecting a huge "paycheck" that night, after all I was fully aware that my old 110lbs self didn't exist anymore and that there was this newer, curvier girl who was 25lbs heavier but with no regulars at this new location...but sheesh, not one dance? Granted, this was Dolphin I on a mid-shift which means probably 6 men rolled through the place the entire time and there were about 8 girls working. Anyway, toward the end of my shift my best friend introduced me to a club regular (as opposed to "her regular" which means he's not good for dances but you can hang out with him, he's there everyday and he'll buy you a drink). Directly after being told, "this is Natalia, she's my best friend and we worked at Stars together" he proceeded to look me up and down in a calculating sort of way and then told me that he'd been watching me on stage all night and that I was a good dancer and pretty but would start to make money once I lost some weight in my stomach...and did I do sit-ups every day? Cause I should... I remember just staring and trying to decide whether I should offer excuses (um excuse me I just had a baby...) or punch him in his all-knowing mouth. My best friend, bless her heart, immediately came to my defense and told him I had just had a child. This then just encouraged him to mention the sit-ups to me again which is when I excused myself and left.
Usually we dancers get complimented many times throughout our shifts which is, for me, a very helpful tool for getting through the process of stripping my clothes off. I realize I shouldn't take so much stock in what other think of me/ say to me but I do...When someone says I'm beautiful they are going to get quite a show from me because their comment probably affected my confidence level in a positive way. I haven't received many negative comments throughout my years of dancing but, of course, I remember almost all of them. Recently (in the past year) I've been told maybe 2-3 times by different men, "You do amazing pole tricks for a bigger/thicker girl". Now, I realize that these people are probably genuinely trying to give me a compliment but for ME...this is one of the most insulting things you can say...and my performance immediately goes down a few notches because I find myself looking at my naked body (which I suddenly become consciously aware of) for "jiggly parts". I'm 5'3" and 128lbs...that's not "big" or "thick"...I'm also quite toned due to my pole work (although I could definitely be toner!) One girl who happened to be the date of one of these men was shocked when she heard what had come out of her man's mouth and immediately, before I could begin the internal shrivelling process, reprimanded him by telling him that "big boobs and a round ass does not equal thick Dan, and the rest of her is thin!". She then apologized to me and made "Dan" tip me more money...what a sweetheart.
I've noticed over the years that men...and women...do feel that they can say ANYTHING to a dancer, as though we can't possibly feel hurt by it. Some people probably just honestly don't know how to use tact. I was recently watching a very talented dancer on stage with one of my customers and I mentioned, when this dancer did a particularly awesome trick, that I wanted to try that one but wasn't sure if I would be able to do it (in my head I was thinking about whether I was flexible enough while trying to memorize her hand positions which were a key element of the trick). My customer said, "You know why you can't do this trick and she can? She's younger and skinnier than you". Yeah...he got yelled at. I honestly think it's the only time I've EVER yelled at a customer. I think it was something to the tune of that he should count how many dancers were there that night that were younger and skinnier than me who could also do the pole work that I do (and that pole tricks are about talent, strength and flexibility...not youth or weight).
Most of the time I honestly don't think it's a lack of tact that's the issue, it's just a misunderstanding of what/who a stripper is. It seems as though the fact that we get naked for a living translates to some people as "Hi, I'm a stripper. I get naked and therefore do not feel the same feelings that you do. Please feel free to say things to me that you would never say to any other woman you know such as your mother, sister, coworker or girlfriend. Don't worry, I've heard it all and will not get hurt. And you DID tip me a dollar on stage so...you've paid for the right to say whatever you want to me!" This doesn't just extend to the nicely packaged compliments wrapped in insults ("you're so pretty, if only you could do some sit-ups every night"/ "you're a really good dancer for a bigger girl") but it also affects a customer's curious idea of a "body part" compliment. Now, I'm a little...conservative when it comes to what I am willing to put up with so not all dancers will agree with me on this but I detest most body part compliments. I love hearing I'm beautiful, you love my eyes/hair/lips/whatever. I also will accept breasts/ass/butt compliments as long as those are the terms used. But for some reason I HATE the word "tits" and the moment you say "you have beautiful tits" as opposed to "you have beautiful breasts" I feel offended. I also have a regular...or two...or five that tend to compliment me on my vagina. No. Do not do that. Why? Because I don't give a shit what you think of it and it makes me really uncomfortable to have you comment on it. I've had customers say nice things about it while I was dancing on stage and I literally stopped showing it off for the rest of my set. Again, this is just me and my issues but I would say that it's safer to compliment us dancers (and yes, we love compliments...they do lead to better private dances or more time with us) the way you would compliment anyone else and leave the body parts below the neck out of it.
I guess I just wanted to point out with this blog that I don't usually feel naked when I'm dancing. I'm concentrating on pole work, my customers and the music. But the moments someone says something that I'm sensitive to or offended by I suddenly become hyper-aware of the fact that I'm naked and showing my "body parts" to a bunch of strangers who are judging me on my imperfections.
Monday, April 12, 2010
Thursday, April 1, 2010
Different Club, Different Rules...
Read this great comment on tuscl.net about Casa Diablo recently. I'm quite the stripper snob (I've only worked at the Dolphin Clubs and Stars with a few nights at one smaller club as a feature) and I always thought Casa Diablo was quite...questionable. Have I been there? No. Do I love the vegan concept? Absolutely (I'm a vegan) but my big spending customers are meat eaters and I'm not about to work anywhere that my money-making potential may be hurt because a guy can't get his hamburger there. I guess I've just really been judging this club based on their ads. I assume a clubs ad has one or more of its BEST-looking girls in it...but Casa Diablo's ads feature girls that are not tan, not in shape, and generally are just not trying (See? Total stripper snob!). Part of the problem is that whoever is taking their photos (in cannot possibly be one of Exotic Magazine's photographers...at least not for the last ad I saw) doesn't know how to pose the girls (who are probably gorgeous in real life). I definitely don't have a perfectly flat stomach and so when I do ads (and I've done a lot!) the photographer will try to pose me and the other girls in a way that stretches our abs and backs and turns our face at an angle toward the camera. I mean, duh. The last CD ad I saw had the pasty-white dancers lying flat on their backs looking straight at the camera with their legs spread! I mean, what the hell? Oh, but there were marijuana leaves hiding their private parts so THAT made it classy (no wonder I've never smoked pot...I must have foreseen this image).
Anyway, so this guy left a comment saying that CD was an amazing club with beautiful girls (I stand corrected!). He also mentioned how...cozy...the girls got with the customers during their performances on stage. This was a BIG selling point to him. And so then I noticed a huge comment left by someone who had recently visited my club. It seems that the majority of the comments about my club are pretty negative while the comments about CD are pretty positive, hmm... The Dolphin II customer mentioned that the girls didn't have a lot of contact with the customers during their stage sets and that during the one couch dance he bought the dancer kept her clothes on and barely made contact with him and that at the Acrop he could get the same dance but with more contact and nude! So this apparently meant that the Dolphin II sucks and he'd never go back.
Fine, but let me explain a few things.
Each club has different rules that the dancers have to follow. At the Dolphin Clubs (both I and II) we are not allowed to have ANY contact (physically) with a customer while we're on stage, and we're not even allowed to lean over the rack too far (you know, the whole brush your hair over the customer's head/crotch routine). Does it still happen? Yeah and I'll get to that in a sec. During our dances we have to stay clothed during a couch dance where we can touch a customer (minimally) and we get naked for a table dance which is supposed to only involve us touching your shoulders and knees. Nope, you can never touch us and we're not supposed to sit on the couch next to you during the table dances (but we do sit next to you or practically ON you during the couch dances). I worked at the Lucky Devil Lounge a few times (lovely club and lovely dancers but too small for my needs) and when I asked about the rules I was given a blank stare (this was by the DJ cause there was no manager there which was a new experience for me). Finally one of the girls told me that we could do anything as long as the customer didn't touch us and we shouldn't really "cross the line" which I knew meant no grabbing of penises (ew.), no allowing nipples to be sucked on (double ew.) and no allowing customer's fingers to...well, you know. So definitely a more liberal dance compared to one at the Dolphin but I still think the Dolphin dances are awesome... which I'll explain in a sec.
Not only are club rules different but each dancer is different too. I personally love doing pole work. Why? Cause I feel RIDICULOUS making sexy faces at my customers while slapping my ass or grabbing my breasts for an entire dance. I do approach the customers and say hi/lean toward them but that takes up about 25% of my set. I also still touch myself while on stage but it's more of a time-filler while I'm gearing up for another bit of choreography (but no, I don't look bored). Other dancers spend their entire set going clockwise from customer to customer while just spreading their legs on the rack (fine, to each his own). The Dolphin II guy said he felt a girl's stage set determined how her private dances would be. I agree that in theory this should be the case, after all our stage sets are part of our marketing, but it's just not always how it works. I'm very...dancy (nope, not a real word) on stage but that's not how I am during my couch dances. Actually, that would be hilarious cause I do a lot of dramatic hand movements (shut up I can't help it I have classical training!) so I wonder what a customer would do if I started doing flamenco hand gestures and pointing my toes mid couch dance, ha! I also don't spend tons of time spreading my legs sans panties while on stage but during a table dance, well, you get what you paid for.
The guy at D2 that got his dance was disappointed in it but he only got one dance from one girl who, from his description, was either really new or not very creative because she kept repeating the same movements over and over. Yeah, during our couch dances we have certain restrictions we have to stick to and our clothes have to stay on but that doesn't mean it has to be boring! Us "top" girls know how to keep a guy back in the champagne room for a minimum of 5 songs (and then we'll just drag you to the VIP room for the BETTER dance...). We're creative, we don't get repetitive, and oops, my dress is so low-cut my breasts just keep popping out of it!
Another reason some of us dancers are different from others within the same club is not just personal choice but that we were hired by different managers at different times. I have always typically been a "night girl" which means we follow stricter rules because night is usually when the OLCC used to come in and we also have more bouncers around to watch us during this time. "Day girls" usually have (and again, I'm only speaking from my experiences with Stars and the Dolphin clubs) more leniency because of less government involvement during the day and less bouncers to see what's going on. I remember the first time I worked a mid-shift on a wed at D1 (I'd only done fri/sat late shift before). A girl got down from her stage mid song and began giving indivual table dances to each guy at her rack. Whore!!! My shock was pretty apparent but my friend (a knowledgeable day/night girl) informed me that this was pretty common practice for a wed early evening performance. If this girl had done that after 8pm she would have been fired (and then of course rehired a week later as is standard in my industry).
One thing I really appreciated about Stars was that the owner made the rules and expected all the managers (day and night) to stick to them. Not so with the Dolphin. I was hired by "S" who said there was no girl-on-girl action allowed on stage (boo!), no touching customers at the rack and no, I could never go home early...ever. But then "P" was hired who allowed me to make out with all the girls I wanted to for profit (yay!), didn't care when a girl climbed over the rack to sit on a guys lap during a stage performance (whore! boo!) and let me leave an hour early (sweet.). Girls who were hired by "P" were told they could do couch dances in see-thru dresses which sent us "S" girls into an uproar. Needless to say, it would get VERY confusing depending on what manager you were working with that night. I would get talked to by one cause I (gasp!) didn't put my hair back in a ponytail during my couch dance and then I'd get pissed at another for allowing a girl to give a guy a mock BJ during a table dance. My job is just so complex!!! ;)
Oh, one last thing. Sometimes there are different rules for different girls! I'm not going to get TOO detailed here but I'll just say that maybe at a certain club I don't have to pay a house fee or I may pay a reduced one (I mean, afterall, I AM famous!) while other girls don't get that privilege. Or I get to leave early or come in late but others have to stick to the regular shifts, or I can work whatever shift I want (or make up my own shift) but others are designated "day girl" or "night girl". While I bitch and moan that all the rules should be the same I have to admit I love my privileges so I should probably shut up now.
In closing, one couch dance should not be a representative image of what ALL D2 dances are like, and one visit to a club (on a friggin' Wed. afternoon or whatever it was) shouldn't represent an entire experience that everyone will end up having at that particular club. Give the club...and a different girl...another chance!
Anyway, so this guy left a comment saying that CD was an amazing club with beautiful girls (I stand corrected!). He also mentioned how...cozy...the girls got with the customers during their performances on stage. This was a BIG selling point to him. And so then I noticed a huge comment left by someone who had recently visited my club. It seems that the majority of the comments about my club are pretty negative while the comments about CD are pretty positive, hmm... The Dolphin II customer mentioned that the girls didn't have a lot of contact with the customers during their stage sets and that during the one couch dance he bought the dancer kept her clothes on and barely made contact with him and that at the Acrop he could get the same dance but with more contact and nude! So this apparently meant that the Dolphin II sucks and he'd never go back.
Fine, but let me explain a few things.
Each club has different rules that the dancers have to follow. At the Dolphin Clubs (both I and II) we are not allowed to have ANY contact (physically) with a customer while we're on stage, and we're not even allowed to lean over the rack too far (you know, the whole brush your hair over the customer's head/crotch routine). Does it still happen? Yeah and I'll get to that in a sec. During our dances we have to stay clothed during a couch dance where we can touch a customer (minimally) and we get naked for a table dance which is supposed to only involve us touching your shoulders and knees. Nope, you can never touch us and we're not supposed to sit on the couch next to you during the table dances (but we do sit next to you or practically ON you during the couch dances). I worked at the Lucky Devil Lounge a few times (lovely club and lovely dancers but too small for my needs) and when I asked about the rules I was given a blank stare (this was by the DJ cause there was no manager there which was a new experience for me). Finally one of the girls told me that we could do anything as long as the customer didn't touch us and we shouldn't really "cross the line" which I knew meant no grabbing of penises (ew.), no allowing nipples to be sucked on (double ew.) and no allowing customer's fingers to...well, you know. So definitely a more liberal dance compared to one at the Dolphin but I still think the Dolphin dances are awesome... which I'll explain in a sec.
Not only are club rules different but each dancer is different too. I personally love doing pole work. Why? Cause I feel RIDICULOUS making sexy faces at my customers while slapping my ass or grabbing my breasts for an entire dance. I do approach the customers and say hi/lean toward them but that takes up about 25% of my set. I also still touch myself while on stage but it's more of a time-filler while I'm gearing up for another bit of choreography (but no, I don't look bored). Other dancers spend their entire set going clockwise from customer to customer while just spreading their legs on the rack (fine, to each his own). The Dolphin II guy said he felt a girl's stage set determined how her private dances would be. I agree that in theory this should be the case, after all our stage sets are part of our marketing, but it's just not always how it works. I'm very...dancy (nope, not a real word) on stage but that's not how I am during my couch dances. Actually, that would be hilarious cause I do a lot of dramatic hand movements (shut up I can't help it I have classical training!) so I wonder what a customer would do if I started doing flamenco hand gestures and pointing my toes mid couch dance, ha! I also don't spend tons of time spreading my legs sans panties while on stage but during a table dance, well, you get what you paid for.
The guy at D2 that got his dance was disappointed in it but he only got one dance from one girl who, from his description, was either really new or not very creative because she kept repeating the same movements over and over. Yeah, during our couch dances we have certain restrictions we have to stick to and our clothes have to stay on but that doesn't mean it has to be boring! Us "top" girls know how to keep a guy back in the champagne room for a minimum of 5 songs (and then we'll just drag you to the VIP room for the BETTER dance...). We're creative, we don't get repetitive, and oops, my dress is so low-cut my breasts just keep popping out of it!
Another reason some of us dancers are different from others within the same club is not just personal choice but that we were hired by different managers at different times. I have always typically been a "night girl" which means we follow stricter rules because night is usually when the OLCC used to come in and we also have more bouncers around to watch us during this time. "Day girls" usually have (and again, I'm only speaking from my experiences with Stars and the Dolphin clubs) more leniency because of less government involvement during the day and less bouncers to see what's going on. I remember the first time I worked a mid-shift on a wed at D1 (I'd only done fri/sat late shift before). A girl got down from her stage mid song and began giving indivual table dances to each guy at her rack. Whore!!! My shock was pretty apparent but my friend (a knowledgeable day/night girl) informed me that this was pretty common practice for a wed early evening performance. If this girl had done that after 8pm she would have been fired (and then of course rehired a week later as is standard in my industry).
One thing I really appreciated about Stars was that the owner made the rules and expected all the managers (day and night) to stick to them. Not so with the Dolphin. I was hired by "S" who said there was no girl-on-girl action allowed on stage (boo!), no touching customers at the rack and no, I could never go home early...ever. But then "P" was hired who allowed me to make out with all the girls I wanted to for profit (yay!), didn't care when a girl climbed over the rack to sit on a guys lap during a stage performance (whore! boo!) and let me leave an hour early (sweet.). Girls who were hired by "P" were told they could do couch dances in see-thru dresses which sent us "S" girls into an uproar. Needless to say, it would get VERY confusing depending on what manager you were working with that night. I would get talked to by one cause I (gasp!) didn't put my hair back in a ponytail during my couch dance and then I'd get pissed at another for allowing a girl to give a guy a mock BJ during a table dance. My job is just so complex!!! ;)
Oh, one last thing. Sometimes there are different rules for different girls! I'm not going to get TOO detailed here but I'll just say that maybe at a certain club I don't have to pay a house fee or I may pay a reduced one (I mean, afterall, I AM famous!) while other girls don't get that privilege. Or I get to leave early or come in late but others have to stick to the regular shifts, or I can work whatever shift I want (or make up my own shift) but others are designated "day girl" or "night girl". While I bitch and moan that all the rules should be the same I have to admit I love my privileges so I should probably shut up now.
In closing, one couch dance should not be a representative image of what ALL D2 dances are like, and one visit to a club (on a friggin' Wed. afternoon or whatever it was) shouldn't represent an entire experience that everyone will end up having at that particular club. Give the club...and a different girl...another chance!
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Control
This is kind of hard to talk about, no it's really hard to talk about but there are so many other brave dancers/escorts/etc. out there speaking up about these things that I figure I can be brave too...maybe.
The other night a man asked me to do some dances in the VIP room with him. At my club (one of the more stricter/no touching/no lap dances clubs) we have a champagne room ($20 for a couch or table dance) and a VIP room. In the VIP room it's $100 for 3 songs or $250 for 30 minutes (and yes, the club gets a cut of that money). The VIP room is very private with gauzy curtains that block a bouncer's sight but are easy to push aside with no previous warning to the dancer and her customer. There's also (obviously, with gauze curtains being a facade of separation) no sound blockage, and it's hilarious to hear another customer's mumbled pleading or a dancer's fake moans while trying to get through my own "performance". Anyway, so a customer asked me to go back there for 3 songs the other night, and I ignored my better judgment and agreed...sigh.
This guy (no idea what his name is) has bought dances from me occasionally when we see each other over the past year in the champagne room. I have no idea why he keeps going back to me instead of choosing another...more compliant girl. I never allow him to go as far as he wants to, and I just don't understand why someone would want to spend $20 for 3 minutes of doing something that looks like a cross between arm-wrestling and an awkward handshake (yes, that's what it often looks like when I'm trying to keep someone's hand from creeping between my legs). I usually ONLY do VIP room dances with regulars (people I somewhat if not completely trust to respect my boundaries) but I rationalized my greed by reminding Mr. Handsy of my "no no areas" and since he nodded his agreement of our verbal no touching contract with innocent bambiesque eyes I led the way back to the gauzy dungeon of hell without even warning a bouncer to check on us.
I'm an idiot (how's that for a topic sentence?). The gauze curtain apparently had invisible writing on it that's only visible to asshole customers which said, "Ignore any two letter word beginning with n that this girl says...she doesn't mean it!". I don't want to linger on the details but he grabbed me, pulled me on top of him and began going straight for the areas (with his mouth and hands) that I had always in the past and again that night told him he could not go near...then he even tried to kiss my...never mind. Luckily, before I acquired some sort of disease, I was able to push away from him before he did that. But then his hand was there and I was desperately trying to pull it away while saying NO progressively louder and louder. The moment that really gets to me is not that he ignored my verbal protests but more that he fought my attempts to pull his hand away from between my legs. I can understand a language barrier and even a cultural barrier (not that those things would be justification for this situation...ever) but really, a girl is pushing your hand away with all her strength and you FIGHT her? The optimist in me is telling myself that he only treated me this way because I'm a "stripper" (a woman with no values who is used to being disrespected and RAPED, right?) and would never treat a woman this way outside of the club...God I hope not. BTW, he stopped (because my yelling scared him) before he did something that would have ended up with him in jail...I'm intact and ok).
The next time I worked I did a VIP for a regular (who I know will read this) and had to have a talk with him about the concept of control. He struggles with allowing me to be in charge during our dances. This doesn't mean that he is anything like the previous person I was talking about, he just likes to take over and decide the "script" for our VIP's. Even though he respects my rules for dances I still had to explain that he had to allow me to have that control back. He can request something and I'll do it if I'm comfortable but when someone suddenly jumps up and wants to hug me/waltz with me/position me in some pose I get completely freaked out, thanks to guys like Mr. Handsy. I even sometimes dance for guys that lean forward too much and try to rub their face all over mine...doesn't sound like a big deal but it just makes me lean away more. I can do an amazing job if someone will sit there and let me...after all, I AM the expert at this! But when someone starts "writing the script" I honestly just get uncomfortable. So let me do my job dammit and please understand (this is for you good guys out there, not Mr. Handsy who I will never be dancing for again) that if I get nervous or need you just to sit there it's not only because I'm following the club rules but also because I feel safer, more comfortable and happier when I feel that the person in control behind the gauzy curtain is me.
***April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month...NO MEANS NO.
The other night a man asked me to do some dances in the VIP room with him. At my club (one of the more stricter/no touching/no lap dances clubs) we have a champagne room ($20 for a couch or table dance) and a VIP room. In the VIP room it's $100 for 3 songs or $250 for 30 minutes (and yes, the club gets a cut of that money). The VIP room is very private with gauzy curtains that block a bouncer's sight but are easy to push aside with no previous warning to the dancer and her customer. There's also (obviously, with gauze curtains being a facade of separation) no sound blockage, and it's hilarious to hear another customer's mumbled pleading or a dancer's fake moans while trying to get through my own "performance". Anyway, so a customer asked me to go back there for 3 songs the other night, and I ignored my better judgment and agreed...sigh.
This guy (no idea what his name is) has bought dances from me occasionally when we see each other over the past year in the champagne room. I have no idea why he keeps going back to me instead of choosing another...more compliant girl. I never allow him to go as far as he wants to, and I just don't understand why someone would want to spend $20 for 3 minutes of doing something that looks like a cross between arm-wrestling and an awkward handshake (yes, that's what it often looks like when I'm trying to keep someone's hand from creeping between my legs). I usually ONLY do VIP room dances with regulars (people I somewhat if not completely trust to respect my boundaries) but I rationalized my greed by reminding Mr. Handsy of my "no no areas" and since he nodded his agreement of our verbal no touching contract with innocent bambiesque eyes I led the way back to the gauzy dungeon of hell without even warning a bouncer to check on us.
I'm an idiot (how's that for a topic sentence?). The gauze curtain apparently had invisible writing on it that's only visible to asshole customers which said, "Ignore any two letter word beginning with n that this girl says...she doesn't mean it!". I don't want to linger on the details but he grabbed me, pulled me on top of him and began going straight for the areas (with his mouth and hands) that I had always in the past and again that night told him he could not go near...then he even tried to kiss my...never mind. Luckily, before I acquired some sort of disease, I was able to push away from him before he did that. But then his hand was there and I was desperately trying to pull it away while saying NO progressively louder and louder. The moment that really gets to me is not that he ignored my verbal protests but more that he fought my attempts to pull his hand away from between my legs. I can understand a language barrier and even a cultural barrier (not that those things would be justification for this situation...ever) but really, a girl is pushing your hand away with all her strength and you FIGHT her? The optimist in me is telling myself that he only treated me this way because I'm a "stripper" (a woman with no values who is used to being disrespected and RAPED, right?) and would never treat a woman this way outside of the club...God I hope not. BTW, he stopped (because my yelling scared him) before he did something that would have ended up with him in jail...I'm intact and ok).
The next time I worked I did a VIP for a regular (who I know will read this) and had to have a talk with him about the concept of control. He struggles with allowing me to be in charge during our dances. This doesn't mean that he is anything like the previous person I was talking about, he just likes to take over and decide the "script" for our VIP's. Even though he respects my rules for dances I still had to explain that he had to allow me to have that control back. He can request something and I'll do it if I'm comfortable but when someone suddenly jumps up and wants to hug me/waltz with me/position me in some pose I get completely freaked out, thanks to guys like Mr. Handsy. I even sometimes dance for guys that lean forward too much and try to rub their face all over mine...doesn't sound like a big deal but it just makes me lean away more. I can do an amazing job if someone will sit there and let me...after all, I AM the expert at this! But when someone starts "writing the script" I honestly just get uncomfortable. So let me do my job dammit and please understand (this is for you good guys out there, not Mr. Handsy who I will never be dancing for again) that if I get nervous or need you just to sit there it's not only because I'm following the club rules but also because I feel safer, more comfortable and happier when I feel that the person in control behind the gauzy curtain is me.
***April is Sexual Assault Awareness Month...NO MEANS NO.
Friday, March 26, 2010
A Missed Connection
Recently a regular customer of mine wrote to me on "Missed Connections" on Craigslist to complain about a stripper that had let him down and abused his trust (I'm not sure why he used this avenue to talk to me but he was drinking so...). I noticed that someone had responded to my customer's message, and here it is (I've added the numbers for my own convenience, they were not in the original text):
1. You may be new to this, but never EVER trust a stripper. Everthing that comes out of a strippers mouth is BULLSHIT to get you to keep coming into the Club and keep spending money on them. I work as a manager at one of these clubs and can tell you all this for a fact. 2. Strippers are selfish nasty money grubbing bloodsucking bitches. 3. Since most of them have a pimp outside the club, they get a school on taking you to the cleaners and keeping you happy one step at a time. 4. Many of these bitches rotate clubs on a regular basis because they have fucked over so many customers. By the time the girl comes back to that club, you won't remember what she did.
Couple things not to do at Strip Clubs is:
5. Give a stripper your real name. They don't give you theirs.
6. Show too much cash or gold the first time you come in. 7. They will expect it every time and think you are an easier mark
8. Don't ever think a stripper is NICE. She is a salesperson, that is it!
If you ever do hookup with a stripper outside the club 9.(she will escort for money). never take her to your place (you WILL get robbed later on) and carry a gun just in case her and her pimp try to rob you.
10. Never use a Credit or Debit Card, use Cash ONLY! Cards are used by alot of drunk guys. Cards are a gateway to your private information and bank accounts.
Alright, time to break this down:
1. I agree, while many of us are actually pretty honest (I wear my wedding ring at work and tell guys right away that I will not meet them outside of the club when they ask...and they always do) we ARE there to entertain you, make sure you have a good time, and make money by doing so. We are not obligated to be honest (we use stage names, duh) and I would agree that you probably shouldn't trust us.
2. Ouch, had a few bad experiences? I just ADORE gross generalizations!
3. A pimp? I thought we were talking about strippers? Prostitution and stripping are COMPLETELY separate entities. My money...all of it, goes into MY bank account. I make my own quotas so I guess I'm my own pimp.
4. I'm only at one club now but there are a few in town that I've worked at/featured in that you'll see me in once in a great while. I know many girls rotate clubs but I've found that the longer I'm at one club the more money I'll make because I'll get long-term regular customers who are really particular to that club. Many of the girls I work with I've known for 6 years now because they've worked regularly at the same 1-2 clubs that I have. Again, major generalization sir (or lady)!
5. Sure, why not. You may not realize it but you already have stage names. A few of my names for my regulars are: "whale" (as in the $$$ he spends, not a weight reference), "mullet", "touchy", "nipples", and "marine".
6. Ha! I actually avoid the assholes that put piles of money on top of their table like bait to lure the strippers toward them. You won't hand it out unless we drink the shots that you're lacing with date-rape drugs, no thanks. And what's with the comment about gold? Do you think we have a way of melting it down in our dressing room? Oh, maybe we're the ones promising cash for gold in those commercials! Yeah, make sure you hide all that gold from us, we're like friggin' 49ers!
7. Good point but also a bad point. If you spend a lot on me the 1st night I will make you a priority the next time you show up, do you want that? If you don't spend a lot on me the first night I will keep dancing for you (if you want me to) until you do. Many of my regulars have jumped from $40/night guys to VIP regulars. I would never say, "Hey! Last time you spent $100! How dare you stop at one dance tonight, how dare you..."
8. I am a salesperson and I am also nice. So all salespeople are not nice? What a strange comment.
9. It's "SHE and her pimp", not "HER and her pimp". Oh sorry my issue wasn't supposed to be about your grammar. I will NOT escort for money. Again, most strippers are not prostitutes/escorts (which are also not always the same thing) and I have never slept with a customer and most girls I know in the industry wouldn't either.
10. I agree. Not because we're all thieves but customers do tend to drink too much and then stagger to the ATM...some will even tell a dancer their pin # so the dancer can get the $$$ out for them. Stupid. But it's not a dancer's fault if you get drunk and spend too much money, it's yours.
So, thank you random "Missed Connections" replier for getting involved in this issue and straightening my customer out. I told him to make sure that he read your message, I think it will help.
1. You may be new to this, but never EVER trust a stripper. Everthing that comes out of a strippers mouth is BULLSHIT to get you to keep coming into the Club and keep spending money on them. I work as a manager at one of these clubs and can tell you all this for a fact. 2. Strippers are selfish nasty money grubbing bloodsucking bitches. 3. Since most of them have a pimp outside the club, they get a school on taking you to the cleaners and keeping you happy one step at a time. 4. Many of these bitches rotate clubs on a regular basis because they have fucked over so many customers. By the time the girl comes back to that club, you won't remember what she did.
Couple things not to do at Strip Clubs is:
5. Give a stripper your real name. They don't give you theirs.
6. Show too much cash or gold the first time you come in. 7. They will expect it every time and think you are an easier mark
8. Don't ever think a stripper is NICE. She is a salesperson, that is it!
If you ever do hookup with a stripper outside the club 9.(she will escort for money). never take her to your place (you WILL get robbed later on) and carry a gun just in case her and her pimp try to rob you.
10. Never use a Credit or Debit Card, use Cash ONLY! Cards are used by alot of drunk guys. Cards are a gateway to your private information and bank accounts.
Alright, time to break this down:
1. I agree, while many of us are actually pretty honest (I wear my wedding ring at work and tell guys right away that I will not meet them outside of the club when they ask...and they always do) we ARE there to entertain you, make sure you have a good time, and make money by doing so. We are not obligated to be honest (we use stage names, duh) and I would agree that you probably shouldn't trust us.
2. Ouch, had a few bad experiences? I just ADORE gross generalizations!
3. A pimp? I thought we were talking about strippers? Prostitution and stripping are COMPLETELY separate entities. My money...all of it, goes into MY bank account. I make my own quotas so I guess I'm my own pimp.
4. I'm only at one club now but there are a few in town that I've worked at/featured in that you'll see me in once in a great while. I know many girls rotate clubs but I've found that the longer I'm at one club the more money I'll make because I'll get long-term regular customers who are really particular to that club. Many of the girls I work with I've known for 6 years now because they've worked regularly at the same 1-2 clubs that I have. Again, major generalization sir (or lady)!
5. Sure, why not. You may not realize it but you already have stage names. A few of my names for my regulars are: "whale" (as in the $$$ he spends, not a weight reference), "mullet", "touchy", "nipples", and "marine".
6. Ha! I actually avoid the assholes that put piles of money on top of their table like bait to lure the strippers toward them. You won't hand it out unless we drink the shots that you're lacing with date-rape drugs, no thanks. And what's with the comment about gold? Do you think we have a way of melting it down in our dressing room? Oh, maybe we're the ones promising cash for gold in those commercials! Yeah, make sure you hide all that gold from us, we're like friggin' 49ers!
7. Good point but also a bad point. If you spend a lot on me the 1st night I will make you a priority the next time you show up, do you want that? If you don't spend a lot on me the first night I will keep dancing for you (if you want me to) until you do. Many of my regulars have jumped from $40/night guys to VIP regulars. I would never say, "Hey! Last time you spent $100! How dare you stop at one dance tonight, how dare you..."
8. I am a salesperson and I am also nice. So all salespeople are not nice? What a strange comment.
9. It's "SHE and her pimp", not "HER and her pimp". Oh sorry my issue wasn't supposed to be about your grammar. I will NOT escort for money. Again, most strippers are not prostitutes/escorts (which are also not always the same thing) and I have never slept with a customer and most girls I know in the industry wouldn't either.
10. I agree. Not because we're all thieves but customers do tend to drink too much and then stagger to the ATM...some will even tell a dancer their pin # so the dancer can get the $$$ out for them. Stupid. But it's not a dancer's fault if you get drunk and spend too much money, it's yours.
So, thank you random "Missed Connections" replier for getting involved in this issue and straightening my customer out. I told him to make sure that he read your message, I think it will help.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
